


Words That Will Never Be Said

by rororeiko



Category: Arashi (Band)
Genre: Love Confessions, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-11-08
Updated: 2014-11-08
Packaged: 2018-02-24 15:02:37
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,557
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2585726
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/rororeiko/pseuds/rororeiko
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>It’s Nino’s thirtieth birthday and all he wishes for is the courage to confess his one-sided love that he has crushed on for seventeen years.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Words That Will Never Be Said

**Author's Note:**

> Written from Nino’s point of view.  
> Originally posted on pixiv in Japanese as a birthday fanfic for Nino’s birthday last year.  
> (Seeing Ohno’s message on Nino’s birthday really had me having hopes.)  
> Ninomiya, you’ll forever be the seventeen year old boy in our hearts. (●ˊ艸ˋ)ヾ  
> (゜.ー゜)ﾊｯﾋﾟｰﾊﾞｰｽﾃﾞｰ(´・∀・` (･∀･｀)ﾄｩｰﾕｰ♪

“Let’s get married, Kazu.”  
What. What’s going on. What in the world is happening.  
“I thought it was about time we did that, do you dislike it Kazu?”  
So what was happening from just now. Am I dreaming or what?  
No it has to be a dream. Right? Right?!  
“Actually I’d like to marry Kazu right now~ What do you think? Is it still too hastily?”  
Look, it’s just a jo… Wait, what did Ohno-san just say?  
“What’s your answer Kazu?”

“Isn’t it obvious I’d say YES!!!”  
I woke up from my dreams with a shout.  
…It was just a dream, wasn’t it.

2013, June Seventeenth.  
I, Ninomiya Kazunari, have turned thirty today.  
I work as an idol.

There’s a person I like.  
My unrequited love has gone on for about seventeen years.  
The person is a longtime acquaintance of mine and a male idol of the same group, Ohno Satoshi.

I’ve already grown this old.  
I’ve become an old man just like him.

It’s already been seventeen years.  
Although it looks like a long period of time, to me it doesn’t feel that long at all.  
I still remember Ohno-san when I first met him at the theater in Kyoto.  
And I still recall his proud face in Jun-kun’s commercial on the streets days before too.

Seventeen years. During these seventeen years, I never confessed, not even once.  
Well, to protect our friendship and Arashi, I’ve always kept my affection for him in the deepness of my heart.  
(And even if I accidently slip it out, I can trick him to believe that it was a joke or fan service, things like that.)

If the me when I was young knew about this, he’d probably call me “You miserable grown-up” “Coward, scaredy cat”.  
At that time, I thought that I finally got closer to Ohno-san.

In the end, I just kept on crushing on him like a fool.

※

When entering the green room, a familiar voice yelled.  
“NINO――――――――― Happy Bathday!!!!”  
Suddenly a tall figure collided with me. Then he hugged me tightly and with such a strong force.

Aiba-san’s really going to kill me someday.  
“Aiba-san, you’re heavy…” ”Congratulations on your birthday!! From today Nino’s thirty too! You’ve already grown to this age too…”  
“Masaki, Nino seems that he’s hurting so let go of him, please?”  
Sho-san you are my life saver. You’re the only one who can stop this berserk and wild and free Aiba-san anyway.

“Ah sorry sorry!” Aiba-san let me out of his embrace, “Did I hug too hard?”  
A little stronger and you would have killed me thank you.  
“Although thanks for celebrating, Aiba-san it’s not Bathday, it should be Birthday you know?”  
“You didn’t have to go to details―But that’s our Nino!”

Sho-san smiled. “Morning Nino. Happy Birthday.”  
“Thank you Sho-san. I’ve finally met a normal person today.”

“Hey, let’s have dinner together after today’s work!” Aiba-san hopped around me like an over-excited bunny.  
“No thank you.” “Why?! We’ll buy you?!”  
“I plan to go to the Boss Castle today. I’d like to be home alone quietly gaming.”  
After putting my bag aside, I sat on the sofa.

“How about going out for drinks? Wouldn’t that be nice?” Jun-kun who came out of nowhere proposed. “Just the five of us. We’re on break tomorrow anyway.”  
“Nice idea.” Sho-san agreed to that too.

“See―And it’s your birthday too, come on go with us Nino―”  
“Because if I eat with you accidents might happen you kno…”

“Such a lively atmosphere. What’s up?”  
It’s Ohno-san. He looks so cute when he seems sleepy.

“Oh, morning Satoshi-kun. It’s about Nino’s birthday. How about we go grab a drink tonight?”

“I see― Ah, morning Nino.”  
Like always, he come sits directly next to me. And always smiles at me and greets me.

He probably has no idea how much that means to me.

“Good morning Leader~” I also greeted him with a smile.  
Gosh, Ohno-san’s smile is the best in the world.

“What do you think Leader? Nino doesn’t wanna go you know!!” Aiba-san, you’re bothering us.  
“Eh? Me? Um…Let’s go Nino? It’s your birthday after all.”  
God, don’t look at me with those eyes. I, I…

“If Leader says that, I’ll go, okay?”

“What―Why is Nino willing to go after listening to Leader?! Is it because I’m not charming enough?!”  
“That’d probably be the discrimination to the owner to a dog.”

※

After work ended, we headed for the bar that Sho-san made reservations this morning.

When we got to our seats, Aiba-san had already opened the menu. “What shall we have~ Should we first order drinks anyway? Or how about food for now? Oh, the fried side dishes look great, don’t they?”

“Wait a second Aiba-san, you’re rushing too much.” Jun-kun took the menu away from the man.  
“That’s right, let’s order drinks first.” Sho-san called the waiter. “What do you guys wanna drink?”

I was fine with anything actually. About two glasses of alcohol were the best I could do.  
I didn’t like drinking too much alcohol to begin with. When you’re drunk there’s no idea what you might do.

“Me and Nino will have just a beer. Right, Nino?” “Eh, oh.”  
He synchronized with my thoughts again. Ah, I feel my heart racing a bit.  
Ohno-san doesn’t talk that much, but he often knows what’s on my mind.  
Why is that. But I feel happy about it.

※

“Excuse me, the special order of Sakurai-san…”  
“Ah, please bring it over here, thanks.” “Sure.”

When the waiter came back, he put a cake down on our table.  
“I’ll do the rest so it’s fine.” “Okay, if you need anything else please call us.”

“What’s this?” Some kind of surprise?  
“It’s a birthday cake.” Jun-kun planted the candles on it.  
“We asked the staff a little earlier before~” Aiba-san, don’t light the candles! It’s dangerous when YOU have a lighter in your hands!  
Sho-san took the lighter away from him and safely lit the candles. Although there were only three.

If there were thirty that’d be scary. I’m glad it was Sho-san who took care of it.

“We’d thought it’d make Nino happy.” Ohno-san came near me and softly whispered in my ear.  
For me?

“Come on―Hurry up and wish the wishes and blow out the candles Nino~”  
“Wishes you say…”  
I haven’t done that for years. How do you do it, coming to think of it.

Ohno-san laughed, “You wish three wishes and say the first two. The last one is wished in your heart. If you don’t do that, the last one won’t come true.”

“I, I knew that.” My cheeks are getting hot, is it because of the alcohol?  
(Aiba-san had kept on ordering; it’s a pity if I don’t finish them.)

“Come on, get it over with.” J already had a cake knife in his hands.  
“I know, I know. Then…”

“The first one, that Arashi goes on smoothly this year too.”  
It’s definitely this one that comes first.  
“We all will have to do our best, won’t we?” Sho-san smiled.

“The second one is… hm, yeah. I wanna go to Leader’s!”  
“Eh―After MatsuJun the next is Nino?! That’s not fair, I wanna go too!”  
“But my mom doesn’t like it…”

“It’s just a wish; you don’t really need to be bothered by it. Oh, have you finished your last wish Nino?”  
“Yup―I’ve finished.”  
“Then please blow out the candles. I’ll cut it.”  
“Roger―”

With a puff, the candles went out.

The third one was hoping for the courage to confess to Ohno-san.  
Although I don’t think it’ll come true anyway.

※

“Ah~ Miss, please give me and this guy one more beer please~”  
“Masaki, you’re drinking too much!”  
Aiba-san just ordered another beer right now. Really, how many glasses has he drank till now that Aibaka.  
I’ve already… Seven? Already drank seven glasses you know~

“Nino, are you alright?” Ohno-san asked me with a small voice. “Or are you in a bad mood?”

“There’s no such thing like that Oh-chan~ I’m super SUPER happy right now, aren’t I?”  
Ah, how many years has it been since I stopped calling him Oh-chan?  
But it brings back the good days. I’ll call him Oh-chan for the rest of the night~

Why is Oh-chan smiling so bitter? It doesn’t suit you at all, your round and cute face~  
Hey, why did you take my glass? I haven’t drank that at all, it’s such a waste!

“Oh-chan, gimme back my beer―” “Aren’t you thoroughly wasted? No.”  
“What― But it’s still not finished yet―”  
“No. No means no.” Oh-chan pushed me back.

“I don’t care. I wanna drink it!” To get the glass back I pounced on to Oh-chan.  
“Ah, be careful!” “Nino, don’t act so childish!”

“If Oh-chan doesn’t gimme back that, I’m not gonna move from here!!”  
Oh-chan’s body really feels good~ He smells good too…  
But I remember he recently doesn’t put perfume on? Well whatever♪

“Nino’s like a kitty, so cute― Ah, or should it be a doggy? Ah who cares~”  
“These two are already done for… Sorry, the bill please.”  
“Come on, we’re leaving Nino… Hey, this guy won’t get off of Leader!”

No, no no, no no no.  
I wanna be with Oh-chan. Nobody can tear us apart I tell you!!!  
Ah, what… I think I’m getting more and more… sleepy…

※

When I regained my senses, my head hurts like hell.  
When I opened my eyes, it seemed that I was my room. But it was too dark to see anything.

The lights were turned on. “Are you awake?”  
Ah, it’s Ohno-san’s voice…

Huh.  
Isn’t this my room?  
Why is Ohno-san here?!

“First drink this.” He handed me a mug.  
As I slowly drank the water, I finally realized my surroundings.

This was surely not my room. There weren’t any game machines around.  
But whose room is this? It’s not Aiba-san’s, and was Sho-san’s room like this?  
If it were Jun-kun’s, I’d expect it to have more clothing in it.

“Um… Where is this place, Leader?”  
“Well, it’s my room.

Oh, it’s just Ohno-san’s roo… Eh.  
Eh. Ohno-san’s, room.  
What!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

What exactly happened when I lost consciousness?!

“Oh, Ohno-san’s?!” “That’s right. We couldn’t possibly leave you all alone by yourself at your apartment, so Sho-kun said to at least grant one of your wishes… That’s why MatsuJun carried you all the way to my house.”  
“But Leader’s mother…” “It’s alright. It’s not like I could abandon one of my friends so she said it can’t be helped.”

What a surprise that my longtime wish came true this easily.  
To tell the truth, the second wish was just envy towards Jun-kun…

“Come to think of it, you’re not using ‘Oh-chan’ anymore?” He smirked, “Nino was acting such like a puppy to me just like when we debuted.”  
Oh-chan? I haven’t called him that years ago if I recall…  
Ah. AHHHHHHHH!!!

I did get drunk! And to go with it I did a lot of embarrassing things!!!  
“Please don’t say anything more, please. I feel like digging a hole and hiding in it right now.”  
“Ha ha, Nino’s really interesting.”

What is wrong with me today.  
If it were like always, I wouldn’t do such uncool actions and I’d hide my feelings better…  
Is it because I turned thirty? Or is it because today’s my birthday?

I’ve gotten much more daring. Then, is to okay for me to fulfill my last wish?

“Um, Oh-chan.” “What is it?”  
“Could you listen to just one more request?”

He smiled gently at me again, “Are you still drunk? Sure, sure, let’s hear it.”

I don’t want to care anymore.  
I just want to tell you this.

“………” ”Nino?”  
“I… I’d like your permission on something to be exact.”  
“Permission? Now that sounds like something important, on what?”  
“… Is it okay for me to keep on liking you like this, by myself?”

I’ve said it.  
I’ve confessed.

I can’t interpret Ohno-san’s expression.  
Does he feel sick? Or angry? Or…  
“…… From when?”  
“……… It’s cliché, but from when we met at Kyoto.”  
“Why me?”  
“………” “Nino?”

“You are… Apart from this feeling the only one person I can tell everything to. Also you might be the only one in this whole wide world who understands me.”  
You are a very, very important existence to me in my life.

“…I…” “Please don’t say anything!”

“I don’t need your answer; I don’t want to cause you any trouble. I just only want to tell you this right now.”  
If you think about it, it looks like I’d get dumped anyway.  
“The relationship until now is fine. I just… Don’t want to stop liking you…”  
“…Isn’t it painful?”  
“Although painful… I still love you.  
So please… just let me go on liking you…”

I closed my eyes.  
Will he agree to this? Or will he object?

Will he hate me?

“Ah, Nino’s really cute.”  
Huh?  
What kind of answer is this?  
When I opened my eyes again, Ohno-san is… blushing?

“Um, what does that mean…” “It also used to be this way too, you’d always come to my side like a dog.”  
“………” How many years have I been said that?

“Although I’m a cat person, I actually like dogs too.” “Pardon?”  
“You’re like a poor Shibaken now, wagging your tail and using your cute eyes saying ‘May I stick behind you? You don’t have to own me.’, like that.”  
“……” Yes, yes. I know my face looks like a Shibaken.

“How can I ever ignore such a cute thing.” All of a sudden, Ohno-san pulled me in his arms.

“Eh?! Oh, Ohno-san…!”  
“I can’t give you a response right now.” “So didn’t I say I don’t need a response…”

“I do like you Nino, you know?”  
I can’t stop the beating of my heart.  
“But I’m still not sure if it’s the same like Nino’s feelings.”  
Is this really not in my dreams right now?  
“So please wait a little longer, ‘kay? Until I realize my feelings.”

“……So, it’s alright for me to keep on liking you like until now?”  
“It’s okay, it’s not like I dislike it or anything.”  
My ears are so hot that they hurt.

“It’s okay to keep on touching you like always?”  
“Rather I’d say welcome. If the skin ship with Nino stops I’d get lonely.”  
They’re probably… No, definitely turning red right now.

“Is it alright to be and stay by your side?”  
“To tell you the truth, I actually want Nino to be by my side all the time.”

“Then I’ll wait; I’ll wait for you always. I’ve already overcome seventeen years anyway.”  
Dining together also spent me twelve years too.  
It’s alright; my specialty’s always been waiting for long periods of time since the past.

Someday, like that dream I had yesterday, he proposing to me might happen too.

 

Afterwards (Ohno’s POV)

Nino’s fallen asleep again.  
Well, he might still have a hangover.

I gently caressed his hair.  
Nino is really like a mature kid.

Though he’s naughty and selfish on programs and in front of the public, he’s never like that to me.  
He’s seems to be afraid of me getting mad at him and disliking him.

“You can be greedier you know, Nino?” I whispered to Nino sleeping in a small voice

Be affectionate to me more, Kazu.


End file.
